An Eerie Calm After Life's Most Powerful Storm

Well, here I am, two days short of two weeks after losing my most inspiring best friend -- my Mom. My family has all left, except my grandparents, and my dad, sisters, and me are trying to find some sort of normal. To try to describe the void in our lives I can only come up with the word "weird". I know for dad it is really hard. I couldn't imagine losing a spouse. It hurts bad enough losing a Mother. She was such a bright beacon of comfort and support and strength to all of us. She battled cancer for many many years. I want to say at least 10 years. I am being really careful at what I type because if I type anything full of memories or special about mom I will lose it again. I do not see crying as a bad thing, but I just don't want to cry right now. I do sometimes wonder if mom can read these posts that I put on this website. I hope she does. She knows I love her and will never ever forget her, but I just want her to continue to know that.
Home isn't even remotely the same anymore. I was helping dad tonight with all the "thank-you" cards, and I was going through mom's memory book from the funeral that everyone signed, and I just still can't believe she is gone. I guess in a way it still feels like she is just off on vacation and will be back soon, or out at the store, or something. The fact that she will never walk through the house again or greet me as I come through the door after work with a hug, or smile at me in her loving way hasn't quite hit.
Alrighty, thats about all I can write for now. The screen is blurry! I'll share some more about my lovely Mom as time goes on. I do want to thank everybody who sent us money, flowers, or cards. You all may never truly know how grateful we were to know there were people who were touched by such a wonderful sweetheart of a woman...my Mom. Thank you!